Separate the two. If you make the problem the focus of your attention, you even have a shot at recruiting your “opponents” to help you attack it.
Sometimes, enemies become allies. And even if they don’t, you’ve unleashed your leadership on a problem and allowed people to disagree with dignity.
3. Wait.
When it comes to conflict, almost everything gets better overnight.
Don’t respond in the moment. Don’t answer that email yet.
When someone attacks you publicly, don’t respond. Go home. Pray about it. Sleep on it. Talk to God (and a friend) about it. Wake up the next morning, and handle it then.
You’ll respond with far more grace, wisdom and humility. I promise.
4. Take the high road.
The high road isn’t the easy road, but it is the best road. It is so difficult but so worth it.
The emotions that make you want to respond in kind will leave you feeling good for 10 minutes. And they’ll also leave you regretting what you did for 10 years. So don’t.
When I’ve been in my most difficult moments leading change, there are days where I just silently repeated, “Take the high road, take the high road, take the high road” to myself until I decided to do it. In those moments, I’ve been so glad I did.
Leading change without crushing people is as much about your personal conduct as it is about anything else. The other strategies in Leading Change Without Losing It can lead you through the how of organizational change. But when it comes to not crushing people, it’s all about the how of you.
Those are some things I’ve learned. What has helped you? What questions remain? Leave a comment below. I’d love to hear from you!
