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7 Secrets Your Pastors Wish They Could Tell You (But Probably Won’t)

how to encourage your pastor

Most pastors I know have clear calls to ministry, work long hours, carry battle scars, sometimes get discouraged, and struggle to balance vocation and family. You might be surprised by some of the advice I’m going to give about how to encourage your pastor.

They really do have servants’ hearts, but they are human and there are a few considerate things the people in the pews can do to support their pastors. If you could be a fly on the wall when pastors talk amongst themselves, you may be quite surprised by what you hear and how often you would hear the same things over and over.

How to Encourage Your Pastor

Here are seven things your pastor would love to tell you (but probably won’t) that will let you know how to encourage your pastor better:

1. Don’t give me another book to read.

Reading a book takes hours, and reading a book about something in which your pastor is not interested will simply never happen. When you ask the next Sunday if they read the book, you put your pastor in a really bad position. “That is simply never going to happen” seems harsh, and “I will get to it this week” is probably not true. If you want your pastor to read a book, recommend it, tell why you think it will be a blessing, and summarize it in a book review of 250 words. They can pick it up themselves if they want to read more.

2. Don’t complain about something just before worship.

This establishes that your need to vent is more important than the people in the sanctuary receiving the best your pastor has to give. Pastors know there is often discontinuity in the church, but right when church is getting ready to start is NEVER the right time to bring something up. Nothing will ruin a sermon before it starts quicker than a complainer.

3. Don’t drop by the office and expect me to drop what I am doing.

Pastors work under deadlines. We have to write articles, fill out reports, and write and rehearse messages. When a funeral or emergency pops up, those deadlines stay in place, often creating highly pressurized afternoons of preparation. Someone stopping by to “chew the fat” simply exacerbates the tension. Your pastor is a professional, please call and make an appointment so they can give you their full attention.