In my opinion, there are three absolutely necessary skills for leadership: casting vision, executing strategy, and fostering relationships. All leaders are better at one or two of those skills. Which means that all leaders are not as strong in the other one or two areas. I ask leaders all the time which of the three skills they need to improve and to my surprise, they most often say, “I need to be more relational.”
Here are some simple thoughts about being a more relational leader:
- Play fun-but harmless practical jokes.
- Ask people simple personal questions (i.e. How’s your son doing since his surgery?).Take a walk through your organization just to say “Hi” to your staff.
- Send one thank you note every day.Invite a team member and his/her family to your home for dinner.
- Send a small gift to someone who needs encouragement.
- Take someone to lunch.
- Take a staff person with you on a business trip.
- Walk around the office once per day just to say, “Hi” to the people you work with.
- Change your score card: don’t just see success as completing a to-do-list or hitting your numbers. Start seeing success in terms of people and relationships.
- Stop cutting relationships in favor of other “urgent” things. It’s easy to neglect people to finish a project or report. Stop saying, “I don’t have time for people” and start saying, “I can’t afford NOT to spend time with people.”
Remember, if the people you lead don’t feel relationally connected to you, they won’t have any problem leaving you or stabbing you in the back. Help them feel valued, wanted, important, and believed-in and you’ll have a team that will charge Hell with a water pistol for you. Believe in your team. Encourage your team. Make time for your team. Appreciate your team. Make people your agenda!
