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10 Things They Don't Teach You in Seminary

When I first started discerning whether I might be called to be a pastor, the youth pastor I volunteered with would have conversations with me over coffee about ministry. He would often give me nuggets of wisdom he called “things they won’t teach you in seminary.”

I’ve discovered there are indeed several things ministry leaders encounter that they just don’t teach you in seminary, so I’ve compiled a list of them here. Some are funny, some are serious, but they all come from my own experience.

10 Things They Won’t Teach You in Seminary

1) If you “rabbit trail” during a sermon in front of a middle school audience, you may never recover.

2) Pastoral emergencies usually happen a) during a date with your spouse; b) at 2:00am; or c) when you’ve set aside an entire afternoon to finally get caught up on planning and office work.

3) Make sure you specify before a game of spoons at youth group that biting is not allowed.

4) When you don’t know what to say to someone who is hurting, keep your mouth shut, and give them a hug if appropriate.

5) The time God seems to change your plans is when you think you’ve planned the best lesson or sermon you’ve ever done.

6) When two teenage guys are messing around and accidentally land on and destroy a coffee table at the coffee shop your youth group meets at, the best thing to do is apologize, have the students offer to replace the table, and find a new coffee shop to meet at.

7) How to hook up and pull a trailer.

8) The student who gives you the hardest time usually asks the best questions.

9) It’s very, very, very difficult to put your family before ministry, but you need to fight to make sure they are a priority above your job.

10) No matter how long you’re in ministry, you never have it all figured out.

BONUS: Your best and rewarding moments in ministry will often come after a long week in which you wonder repeatedly if God really called you to be a pastor, and if what you’re doing really makes any kind of a difference at all.

Your turn: what would you add to the list?