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A Letter to My Sons About Pornography

A Far Better Place to Look

You, my sons, are called by God to reject sexual consumerism. You are called by Christ to seek pleasure in him, and to pour out your life in selfless giving to God and to others.

Jesus Christ is the opposite of pornography. Jesus lived a life of denial and sacrifice. No lust, ever. Sex for him was unnecessary, even as he imaged God perfectly. He became the least and the last in order to put us first. Pornography is self-exalting. It is putting your pleasures and desires first, before the glory of God and the good of others. Since Christ is the opposite of pornography, then look to Christ in your fight against sexual temptation and sin. When you behold Christ you will become like him.

“For God, who said, ‘Let light shine out of darkness,’ has shone in our hearts to give the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ” (2 Corinthians 4:6).

Look upon his face, and pornography will begin to look strangely dim.

A Safe Place After Sexual Failure

When Moses asked God to show him his glory (Exodus 33:18).

And if you are drawn into the illicit pleasures of the Internet, remember the words of Robert Murray McCheyne, “For every look at yourself, take 10 looks at Christ.” One look at your sinful self calls for 10 looks at Christ nailed to a cross for you. Being in Christ is the only qualification we need to behold his glory, even after we have sinned. He alone is the cure and the prevention for your sin.

Be Thou My Vision

Remember what Jesus said in Matthew 6:22:

“The eye is the lamp of the body. So, if your eye is healthy, your whole body will be full of light.”

A healthy eye connotes clear vision, and you will have a spiritually healthy way of looking at things (like the gift of sex). But your eyes can lie to you if you only see with them and not through them. The eye can distort your heart and mind if you are using it only to see what is directly in front of you. When your eyes are filled with the glory of God in Christ, you will clearly see through the distorting lies of lust.

Before Daddy and I had you boys, we planned our wedding. I wanted to play my favorite hymn, “Be Thou My Vision,” before I walked down the aisle. My prayer was that Christ would always be my vision in marriage, but now that prayer surrounds you both as well. I pray Christ would be your vision in all of life—that your eyes would be filled with glory leading to truth and life and joy. What you put before your eyes will change you. May it fill you with light, and not darkness.

Love,
Your Mama